Official biography · unverified

The Legend (of himself)

Two truths for every club. You decide which one is real.

  1. 01

    FC Porto

    2002–2004
    Remembers

    “I conquered Europe with a small club. Alone. Against everything.”

    Actually

    Actually true. We apologize for the inconvenience.

  2. 02

    Chelsea FC

    2004–2007
    Remembers

    “I turned money into history. The Special One was born.”

    £££
    Actually

    Unlimited budget, two titles, then a very special meltdown.

  3. 03

    Inter Milan

    2008–2010
    Remembers

    “The Treble. The greatest campaign ever coached by anyone.”

    Actually

    Genuinely iconic. He is insufferable about it for a reason.

  4. 04

    Real Madrid

    2010–2013
    Remembers

    “We defeated the greatest Barcelona in history with pure tactics.”

    ¡OH!
    Actually

    Poked a coach in the eye, lost the locker room, won one Cup.

  5. 05

    Chelsea FC (II)

    2013–2015
    Remembers

    “The Happy One returned and restored natural order.”

    Actually

    Title, then the medical staff entered folklore. Eva said hi.

  6. 06

    Manchester United

    2016–2018
    Remembers

    “I won three trophies at a club in decay. Nobody else could.”

    Actually

    Football heritage, a beaten bottle rack, and a Pogba cold war.

  7. 07

    Tottenham

    2019–2021
    Remembers

    “I was building something special. They had no patience.”

    Actually

    Sacked six days before a cup final. Even we felt that one.

  8. 08

    AS Roma

    2021–2024
    Remembers

    “A European final in Rome. They will build me a statue.”

    Actually

    One Conference League, one broken final bus, zero chill.

  9. 09

    Fenerbahçe

    2024–
    Remembers

    “I came to Turkey to prove the whole world wrong again.”

    ?
    Actually

    Currently proving the whole world… something. Stay tuned.